My American Journal

I've been wanting to write this out, but I didn't know where to start and was worried that if I did start I wouldn't know how to wrap it up. So many emotions have been bottle up inside me, to the point where, if any more minute pressure is added, the content will come gushing out. Oh, so I started. Now I need to figure out how to finish.

When I first came here to the US, I thought I knew what I came here for. But then as time ran by, I came to realize there was a lot more to that purpose I originally set my mind to. For a while I waded through a swamp of uncertainty; the sludge was pulling me down and my movements were jerky. At last I hit a hard land again. Then I groped my way through a pitch-dark tunnel, feeling the wall, taking baby steps so I wouldn't trip over. Then I saw this glowing butterfly. She was so beautiful that she got me lost in thoughts for a moment. I snapped back to my senses. Then she hovered over my head. At first I thought she was just teasing me for being helpless, but then as the hovering kept up I figured she was trying to tell me something. Soon I realized she wanted me to follow her. So I resumed my walk, this time a lot easier guided by the butterfly. "Hey butterfly buddy, where are you taking me?" I asked. Guess what she replied? She didn't. Butterflies don't speak. Finally, after a series of one-way dialog, aka monolog, the tunnel ended. Now the butterfly was saying gesturing her farewell. I persuaded, "Aren't you gonna stay? Please, hang around a little longer." Again she didn't answer. I never knew if butterflies have a mouth, but if they do, I think she would be smiling at this moment. So she left, and yet before my eyes, there was this huge gateway structure preceding a narrow, bushy, seemingly endless walkway. Man..and here I thought this journey had ended. I traveled the path, looking around as I tried to find something nice to lay my sight on. Bingo! My eyes caught sight of this glittery tree, which bore so many fruits. I thought to myself, "Now that looks yummy. I've got to try one of those." So I plucked one off, rubbed it against my shirt, and ate a bite of it. And guess what..it tasted..nothing. Not nothing as in tasteless, but this was plain 'nothing'. Now I wondered why a yummy-looking, sweet-smelling fruit should taste 'nothing'? I pondered over this as I walked on. What happened to the fruit? I left it on the ground under the tree. Before I could even scratch the surface of my lingering bewilderment, I jerked to a stop. Now I was looking at a split path, one heading right the other heading left. I scrutinized the nature of both paths, trying to figure out a difference, but they looked so similar that I met a dead end. I wished the butterfly had stayed for I needed her help...

KauBoLEh (3)

I wanted to pick up on the Present Perfect Continuous but there's nothing else really to be discussed. So, I'll just move on to the Past Perfect Continuous for this entry.


The Past Perfect Continuous is used to show the connection of a continuous action that was completed before another past action. The amount of time of the continuous action is expressed with 'for'.

Ex. 1: The fire had been burning for a week by the time it was controlled.

Ex. 2: They had been living in Rochester for 3 years when I came.

Ex. 3: The love letter was sent by a guy who had been stalking her for 3 months.


We use the past perfect continuous:

When an action took place over a period of time;

Ex. By the time the fire was put out, it had been burning for over a week.


We use the past perfect, instead of the past perfect continuous, with:

Nonaction verbs;

Ex. When the fire started, Rochester had had very little rain.


An action of no duration;

Ex. When residents returned, they found out that their homes had been destroyed.

A multiple or repeated action;

Ex. By the time the first half ended, Torres had scored 5 goals.


P/s: My college career has come to an end? I'm still in denial. -__-

boys day out

Shish invited us over to a end-of-the-quarter BBQ at Rustic Village public park near his house this afternoon. We had a great time, thanks to the nice and warm and windy weather. It's nice to be able to have some outdoor activities again after having remained dormant throughout the cold half of Rochester. Those who came were college students from Rochester area, mostly from University of Rochester (UofR). Well..I don't want to type the whole thing out, I guess the pictures can speak for themselves.

Putting teams together for a game. At some point I was worried I was gonna get squeezed between these muscle-bound fellas. ^^"

Me shooting hoops again after a long long while. I ran out of gas just after the first 5 minutes, no kidding.

The earth has been made clean for us to prostrate on..so no excuse not to pray, wherever you are!

This was awesomely delicious! But it would go better with some gravy. :D

I don't know what this is..it's some sort of dessert we had last before we left.

Flocking around for food..Err, I'll pass for now.

Husain Bawani, a doctor to be, an eloquent speaker.

The broiler, and volunteer waiters. Great job keeping the flame burning guys!

Later in the evening, we met this American guy who, I believe, were just stopping by at Islamic Center of Rochester (ICR) from a Lilac Festival that was going on nearby. He wanted to find out about Islam. He said he found the concept of Trinity confusing and that there are so many things in the Bible that don't seem to click. So we had like a small discussion with some other brothers to help clear his confusion. He seemed very interested in knowing the truth about both Islam and Christianity. May Allah lead him to the truth, for He always responds to those who are sincere in their intentions. Ameen. ^^

a 1-minute self-absorption

Intended for decoration ^^

Having reached this age, I still get this; "Oh, you're in college? I thought you were 16!" And I would go like -_-") for a second. Obviously the people here can't guesstimate our age just by looking. I guess having a beard doesn't help in telling that I'm old enough to get married either. It's no biggie actually, why make a fuss out of it..haih. In fact, I should be happy that I look younger on the outside, shouldn't I? (hoho) All the high schoolers I'm friends with are much taller, bigger, sturdier, handsomer than me, and their beards, Subhanallah, three times as big. Well check out what they eat for breakfast: Loaf breads with cream cheese (packets of them). I feel I'm getting fat just at the sight of it. I doubt if they could see the word "mature" written on my face at all. But ironically speaking, being mature has little to do with age; It's not about how long you have lived, but it's about how you behave, think, and react accordingly. Believe me, I've seen a 50-year-old who acted like a child, and it's not a good sight at all. Another definition of being mature would be being ready to take on the responsibilities that come along as you grow older, something I'm still untiringly working on. So, I really wish that this increase in age comes with an increase in taqwa, wisdom, good deeds, and closeness to Allah swt. Otherwise, getting up another level in age does not signify any good, right? And to mom, no matter how much beard I've grown, how many digits I have added to my age, I'm still your sweet little boy.

P/s: And..I insist on keeping, to some extent, this childlike nature of mine. :D

a glimpse into..

Allah swt loves His servants more than a mother loves her baby child. He loves every single human being; He hates the disbelief of the disbelievers, but as human beings Allah swt loves them. We are the best of His creation, whom He created with His own hands in stages. Apart from us, there is also creation that Allah swt created within just two words, 'kun! fayakun' (be! and it is). While all the other creation submits completely to the orders of Allah, we on the other hand can choose either to obey or disobey Him. Choosing to obey Allah, despite all the trials and temptations He has placed against us, elevates us to a high status in His eyes. If, and only if, the disbelievers knew how much love and mercy Allah has upon them, their limbs and flesh will fall off out of overwhelming shame, and even they would think there is a place for them in Jannah.

How do we know that Allah swt loves us so much? There must be signs to that. As for now, let's take a glimpse into the following stories and ponder over them;

1) Once a sinful woman was going on a journey. She saw a thirsty dog sitting by a well. She tied a cloth to her shoe, took water from the well and gave it to the dog. Over this mercy, Allah swt forgave her.

2) There was a sinful person. He did many sins in life. Before death, he advised his sons to burn his body after death and spread the ash in the air and water. His sons did this. In akhirah, Allah swt called that man and asked, "Why did you do this?" He said, "Due to my fear". Allah said, "Only for my fear: I have forgiven you. Go to Jannah."

3) On the day of judgement,there will be 2 sinful men. Allah swt will order them to go to Jahannam. One will run fast to Jahannam. Second will walk slowly, looking backward. Allah swt will call them back. Allah will ask the 1st man, why were you running. He will answer, "I did not obey you in Duniya. Today I want to obey you quickly". The second will answer, "I heard about your mercy and rahmah. Today I am looking towards your mercy". Allah swt will say, "You both go to Jannah".

4) On the day of judgement, a person will be lacking one good deed. Allah will say to him, "Bring one good deed or go to Jahannam". He will go to his relatives and friends. Nobody will give him even one good deed. At last, he will find a person who will have only one good deed with him. He will say, "I have only one good deed. I cannot go to Jannah. Please take my one good deed and you go to Jannah". Allah swt will ask, "Who gave you this one good deed". That person will be called. Allah swt will say, "You did mercy today, I do my mercy, You both go to Jannah".

Courtesy of: deen-path.blogspot.com

When a servant of Allah goes to the masjid, for every step he takes, one reward is written, one sin is removed, and one rank is elevated for him in the hereafter.

When a person intends to do good, a complete reward is written for him; and when he does it, the reward is multiplied at least ten times. When a person intends to do evil, none is written against him; if he stops himself from doing it out of fear of Allah, one complete reward is written for him; and if he does it anyway, only one sin is written against him.

If we look at the the above examples, it goes without saying that Allah swt is the Most Merciful. He forgives His servants for the most trivial of reasons. He is looking for excuses to forgive us every moment in our life. He wants all of us to enter Jannah, and the hellfire is just a warning. For this reason Allah swt sent the best of people (124 thousands anbia' a.s.) to the worst of people to tell about the glad tidings of Jannah and the warnings of Jahannam, so they would come back to Him in repentance. Had He wanted, He could have decided to give equal accounting to good and evil deeds but He had decided long ago that His Mercy is greater than His Wrath. =) Thus it's obviously our loss if we fail to draw a portion of His sheer Mercy upon ourselves. Wallahua'lam.