Well here I am on the very last weekend of my holidays. Hm..this one-week break has been nothing but a disappointment. Hours and hours spent on PS3, watching anime, and other unproductive activities that at the end of the day I'd regret doing. I could not get a single thing done from my work list. Wait, I don't even have a work list to begin with. Great. That's it then. So much for a wonderful break I guess. And yet here I think I can make these last days count. How? Lets see. Oh, I can at least get my brain ready for the kick-off, or clean up my room, or get my laundry beautifully done. Of course I need to also reset my biological clock to default since my circadian rhythm has gone haywire now. My system can no longer tell if it is daytime or nighttime. Well what else would you expect from a prolonged period of sleep deprivation? As a result, I ended up being nocturnal.
Come to think of it, it seems that my whole life has been reduced to an awful period of laxity. Days and nights passed by in waste. This is certainly not the state one would want to die in. Rasulullah saw once said in a hadith, more or less the meaning;
"The dwellers of Jannah will not regret anything except the time they spent in this world without the dzikir (remembrance) of Allah swt."
Looking at this, I can't help wondering how much the dwellers of Hellfire will regret on this Day. And thinking how much time I've wasted so far simply increases the intensity. Only on that day will we realize how precious a single second in this world is. Believe it, on the hereafter scale even half a second of this world counts a lot. Well, of course we all want to improve for the better. I always wanted to occupy my time to the maximum. But to do this we need strength, and this strength comes from iman. And definitely my iman still hasn't reached the level at which I can significantly avoid the irrelevant. So until then I need to work on my iman even more, and you guys too insyaallah. =)
Wallahua'lam
